NURTURE YOUR INNER CHILD

NURTURE YOUR INNER CHILD

“Hold the hand of the child that lives in your soul. For this child, nothing is impossible.” Paulo Coelho

Your childhood forms the foundation of your mental health. It creates a blueprint for who you believe you are and how you see the world around you. Some memories will be positive and some will be difficult and challenging.

What is the Inner Child?

Your inner child is that part of you that for whatever reason maybe didn’t have their needs met as a child.

When we have a strong emotional reaction to something we’re reacting to the present moment because of our past and it’s often your inner child that’s been triggered.

For example, let’s say your boss criticises you for a project you worked really hard on and you feel flooded with emotion - this may be triggering your inner child and your limiting belief ‘I’m not good enough’.

You may be able to access some core memories to help understand your emotional reactions but most will be completely unconscious.

“Your “inner child” is a part of your subconscious that has been picking up messages way before it was able to fully process what was going on (mentally and emotionally). It holds emotions, memories and beliefs from the past as well as hopes and dreams for the future”

No parent is perfect, even the most loving parents make mistakes and of course childhood can be tough in many ways. Nurturing your inner child is a powerful way to bring inner peace to your internal world and give your mental health the boost it needs.

Tapping is a great place to start. Watch the video above to start the healing process.

HOW DO YOU CONNECT TO YOUR INNER CHILD?

"By reparenting our Inner Child, we can release and heal the pain from the past" Margaret Paul

If you’re not sure what your inner child is feeling today, follow this process:

Step 1: Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. Then visualise yourself as a little child sat in front of you. Notice what they're wearing, and what they look like.

Step 2: Ask that little child how they're feeling today and notice what they say.

Step 3: Open your eyes and in your dominant hand write down the question - how are you feeling today?

Step 4: Put the pen in your non dominant hand and write the answer. Notice what comes up.

Step 5: Put the pen back into your dominant hand and write down these words - I am here for you now, you are safe, you are loved.

If you're still not sure what your inner child is feeling you can gently ask yourself these questions.

* Did I feel heard as a child? Did I feel like my parents / caregivers listening to what I had to say? Or did I feel dismissed?

* As a child did I feel seen? Or did I feel ignored?

* Were my emotions always validated? Or was I shamed for expressing how I felt?

* Was it ok to be sad, angry, scared, frustrated.... as a child? Was it safe to express my emotions?

* Did I feel safe as a child? (Emotionally and physically)

* Did I feel loved by my parents?

* Was the love unconditional or was it based on outside factors? (e.g achievements or things I did?)

* Did I feel like I had to prove my worth? (with grades, achievements, being a good girl/ boy, acting a certain way, behaving in a certain manner)

* Was I ever made to feel like I wasn’t good enough?

* Did I ever feel abandoned?

* Did I ever feel shamed, criticised or judged?

* Was I ever hurt (emotionally and physically)?

Or you can try listening to the Inner Child Guided Meditation Below

AFFIRMATIONS FOR YOUR INNER CHILD

Speaking directly to your inner child through meditation, journalling, tapping or any other means is a powerful way to make them feel seen, heard and validated. What do they need to hear today?

• I hear you

• I see you

• All of your emotions are valid

• You are safe

• Your are loved

• You are loving

• You are loveable

• You are enough just the way you are

• You are XXX (use the affirmation that is the opposite of your limiting belief e.g good enough, beautiful, wonderful, clever, strong, funny, kind, whole, good, talented, loved...)

• I am here for you now, you are never alone

• You don't need to be perfect you are human

• It’s ok to make mistakes

Inner Child Support

For more support nurturing your Inner Child please get in touch kim@hapyheads.me and check out my Nurture Your Inner Child Programme I would love to hear from you.

You can also download the Tapping Solution App where I have a 4 Day Inner Child Healing Series. It’s the perfect opportunity to help you reconnect to your inner child. It will enable you to communicate with them, hear what they have to say, gain insight into their limiting beliefs and deeply nourish them in the process. Your inner child really does hold the key to reducing anxiety, overcoming your limiting beliefs, releasing self doubt, overcoming fear and so much more.

5 MIN TAPPING FOR MUMS

Being a mum can be really hard. Most days you are on the go from the moment you open your eyes to the moment you fall asleep. This is a short tapping process to help bring some stillness into your over worked nervous system and also validate all of your mum emotions - they are all valid!

For more support please get in touch kim@happyheads.me I would love to help xx

3 MIN TAPPING TO REDUCE ANXIETY

Anxiety is a completely normal human emotion that everyone experiences to varying degrees. If we didn’t have it we would all be lemmings walking into the road, so anxiety quite literally keeps us safe.

The problem is, our amygdala (brains fear response) doesn’t know the difference between a real and imagined threat. This is why you can feel anxious speaking in public, going on a date, new social situations, thinking about a future event, making new friends, getting on a busy bus….none of these are REAL threats to your life but your amygdala still thinks you’re about to get eaten by a sober toothed tiger.

Tapping is the perfect way to face it head on, which is the quickest way to reduce anxiety and bring stillness to your body and mind. The physical tapping sends a calming signal directly to your amygdala and reminds your nervous system that you are in fact SAFE.

Are you feeling anxious right now? Try this quick 3 minute tapping process and see how you feel.

For more support please get in touch kim@happyheads.me I would love to help xx

5 MIN TAPPING FOR POSTPARTUM MUMS

The postpartum haze is really tough. Your brain has just gone through more changes than at any other time in your life, your body has just birthed your baby and you are permanently sleep deprived. That’s a lot for any new mum to go through!

Tapping really helped me navigate the postpartum phase with both my babies so try this short process now and see how it makes you feel. Mumma - I see you, and I totally feel you - you are doing great!

For more support please get in touch kim@happyheads.me I would love to help xx

TAPPING TO RELEASE YOUR STRESS

WHAT IS STRESS?

"A state of worry or mental tension caused by a difficult situation" World Health Organisation

Stress is a normal part of being a human being, it's a natural response that prompts us to address challenges and threats in our lives. The problem is we live in such a fast paced digital world where people feel like they need to be switched on 24/7 so there are many things that can stress us out.

Endless access to world news, social media, busy jobs, the cost of living, parenting juggles, mobile phones, and the general day to day stress of life...it's easy to see how a normal amount of stress can quickly lead into chronic stress.

Stress can be brief, situational, and a positive force motivating performance, but if experienced over an extended period of time it can become chronic stress, which negatively impacts health and well-being.

WHAT IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING WHEN WE'RE STRESSED?

Anytime you feel stressed your amygdala (brains fear response that contributes to emotional processing) sends out a distress signal to your hypothalamus, which is like a mini control centre in your brain. Your hypothalamus then starts to send out stress hormones (adrenaline, cortisol, and norepinephrine) which then trigger the ancient fight or flight response. Your nervous system then gets your body gets ready for the perceived threat - muscles tense, heart rate quickens, breathing speeds up, digestive system slows down.

This response was designed to protect your body in an emergency by preparing you to react quickly. But when the stress response keeps firing, day after day, it could put your health at serious risk.

WHAT DAMAGE CAN STRESS DO TO YOUR BODY AND MIND?

Short doses of the stress response are ok as your nervous system has the time to go back to a place of rest and relaxation but when you're body is in a constant state of high alert the long term exposure to cortisol and other stress hormones can negatively impact nearly all of your body's process's.

This puts you at higher risk of many health problems, including:

• Anxiety

• Depression

• Digestive problems

• Headaches

• Muscle tension and pain

• Heart disease, heart attack, high blood pressure and stroke.

• Sleep problems

• Weight gain

• Problems with memory and focus

HOW DO WE MANAGE STRESS?

Managing your stress levels is an essential way to look after both your mental and physical health but it's important to remember that life doesn't have to be completely free of stress for you to be able to effectively regulate your nervous system. We can't control what life throws at us, but you can control how you react.

Tapping

Tapping is a wonderful way to bring your nervous system back into balance anytime you feel stressed, try this 10 Min tapping sequence above and notice how it makes you feel with no judgement.

Pepare your Nervous System

The start of the day is really important to get your nervous system ready for the day. Set an alarm (something calming like a bird sound) to wake you up 10 mins earlier and do something that calms your mind. That could be a listening to a meditation, doing some tapping, some breathwork or moving your body like a short yoga sequence. If you’re a mum like me then THIS is how you can meditate in the morning.

Regulate your breathing

Take time throughout the day to bring your breath down into your belly. This is the best way to engage your parasympathetic nervous system (rest and relaxation) and THIS is how you do it:

Be mindful of how you use your phone

Mobile phones can be a big cause of stress and anxiety so be really mindful about how you use your phone throughout the day. Reduce the amount of time you spend on social media, stop reading the news, silence your notifications, don't feel like you need to reply to endless Whatsapp messages, never look at your phone first thing in the morning and last thing at night and physically put your phone away when you are doing another task or sat at the dinner table.

Create a sleep ritual

The end of the day is an important time to signal to your brain - it's time to switch off. Get off any screens at least 1 hour before bed and do something that calms your mind like tapping, meditation, hot bath, journalling, calming smells… When you improve your sleep, it's much easier to regulate your emotions (and stress response) the next day.

Regularly do these three things:
Release jaw, soften hands, relax shoulders.

Listen to this meditation to deeply anchor your mind in the present momet, reduce your stress levels and create a bubble of protection around yourself.

3 MIN TAPPING TO START YOUR DAY

The start of your day is a REALLY important time for your mind. It can make the difference between having a good or bad day. When you set your brain up right you'll be much better equipped to deal with what the day might throw at you. Never look at your phone first thing in the morning it’s like giving your mental health and power away, instead do something that calms and soothes both body and mind.

This 3 minute Tapping Process won't take long at all but will be having a BIG impact on your nervous system - the perfect way to start the day!

TAPPING FOR TEENS

Your teenage years are a HUGE time in brain development and for many adolescents (and caregivers) it can be a tough time to navigate.

Brain changes during the early teen years set up four qualities of our minds during adolescence: novelty seeking, social engagement, increased emotional intensity, and creative exploration. There are changes in the fundamental circuits of the brain that make the adolescent period different from childhood. Each of these changes is necessary to create the important shifts that happen in our thinking, feeling, interacting, and decision-making during adolescence.

This video by Dr Dan Siegel explains exactly what happens to the brain:

For any teen these changes are a big transition to go through so it's normal to experience worries, anxiety or negative thinking. Tapping is a powerful tool to help process your emptions and overcome your anxious, negative thoughts - perfect for teens! Watch the video below to see how easy it is to nurture your wellbeing.

If you’re a teenager, parent or caregiver and would like some more support please get in touch kim@happyheads.me I would love to help xx

TAPPING FOR CHILDREN

Childhood forms the foundation of your mental health and wellbeing, this is why it's so important (as parents and caregivers) to empower children with tools that help them process their emotions. It's really normal for children to have worries but it's often hard for them to identify or even verbalise what’s really going on for them. Tapping is a great way to help children gently process their worries so that things never build and become overwhelming.

As long as your child can speak - they can follow along with the tapping above. If they can't yet speak you can always play a game of 'simon says' and get them to copy what you do as you tap on your body.

If it's your own child and (and they would like you to) you can also try tapping on them. I sometimes tap on my daughter just before she goes to sleep to help her feel calm and relaxed.

You can follow the video above or try these:

1. You can simply tap and breathe (remember children need our nervous systems to help them regulate theirs, this is called co-regulation) so when you take a deep breath, this has a calming effect on them. Either tapping on them or tapping on yourself and they copy you.

2. Tap on them and repeat affirmations like - I love you just the way you are, you are amazing, you are clever, you are kind, you are funny, you are incredible, you are special, you are loved...

3. Get them to tap on themselves while they repeat affirmations like - I am good enough just the way I am, I am special, I am loved, I can be whoever I want to be, I am amazing, I love myself...

For more support helping your child please get in touch kim@happyheads.me xx

PROCESS YOUR BIRTH - 2 DAYS TO GO!

Giving birth can be a magical experience but for some women the opposite may be true. For many different reasons birth can be traumatic having a lasting impact on their mental and physical wellbeing. The spectrum of trauma is a wide one and can range from PTSD (when maybe a mother nearly lost her life during childbirth) not feeling heard, feeling helpless, having things done without consent, emergency c section, unexpected complications or interventions, long painful labour or anything else that a birthing mother finds traumatic.

You may feel disappointed that childbirth was not the experience you were hoping for. Or you might feel angry with the medical staff if you felt that the delivery wasn't handled well. Your experiences may also make you feel anxious about having another baby in future, in case you have to go through a similar experience during birth. - Mind

Trauma is different for everyone so it's important to reflect on how birth effected you both physically and mentally. Even if you had a planned c section, your body is still experiencing a trauma from being cut open. You may have had a good experience but still wish some things had been handled differently. Perhaps there were times you didn't feel like you were being listened to, patronised or ignored - these are all things that have a lasting impact.

Join me on 23rd March at Midday for my 1hr workshop 'Processing Birth'. It's been specifically designed to:

• Create a safe space for all mothers to process their birth.

• Empower you with tools to calm and ground your energy whenever you need (even when with your baby / children).

• Allow your nervous system to emotionally and physically process your experience.

• Improve the quality of your sleep (the short amounts you do get).

• Reduce stress and anxiety connected to motherhood and everyday life.

• Make you feel seen, heard and validate your emotions.

• Improve your confidence as a mother and overcome any fear of birthing again.

• Nurture your mental and physical wellbeing.

During the 1 hr lunchtime workshop you'll learn:

• Insight into birth trauma, birth PTSD what is it and how it can affect people's mental health.

• Breathing Techniques - to calm and ground your whole nervous system.

• Guided Meditation - to help you identify, process and release any parts of your birth you found challenging.

• Emotional Freedom Technique (Tapping) - to help bring your nervous system back into balance and overcome any anxious, negative thoughts you might be experiencing.

The workshop is only £20, click below to book or you can email kim@happyheads.me. It will be recorded for anyone who can't watch the live session so you can watch in your own time.

I can’t wait to see you all there.

Big Love

Kim xx

TAPPING DURING PREGNANCY

Pregnancy is a magical time but it can also be mentally and physically challenging. Your body is going through so many changes, you may have morning sickness, aches and pains, raging hormones, worries about the baby, birth and beyond - it's a big transition! Is my baby safe? Will I cope with birth? Will I be a good mum? Am I eating the right things? How is my life going to change? Will I be able to handle sleep deprivation?

Anxiety during pregnancy is totally normal and every person will have a different thing that's worrying them. It's more important than ever to nurture your mind during pregnancy because this helps you to be as mentally strong as possible postpartum. Regularly tuning in to identify and process your worries is a powerful way to make you feel calm, grounded and empowered throughout the whole journey.

Watch this video to see how tapping can help you do exactly that.

WELLBEING RETREAT - 5 DAYS TO GO!

TRANSFORM YOUR MIND, BODY & SOUL…

“The happy heads retreat was the perfect reset button for me. The retreat was a brilliant combination of self help tricks, reflection and goal setting. Kim is a truly wonderful facilitator who draws on her own experiences and struggles to help her clients rationalise and work trough theirs. I would highly reccomend this retreat to anyone, those with specific areas they want to work on, or those who want to book in and just get a life MOT, it’s a fantastic course I would love to do all over again." Liz

Only 5 days until the Happy Heads Wellbeing Retreat begins! It's been specifically designed to help you transform your mental and physical wellbeing enabling you to kick start 2023 feeling calm, grounded and empowered.

"I got so much from the retreat with Kim. I learned some really effective ways to control my demons and make the day-to-day more manageable. And the guided meditations gave me a beautiful introduction to the practice. Kim has the most open, comfortable and kind presence - it was a real joy. Would highly recommend."

Toby

To make it easily manageable the retreat is set across 4 lunch time sessions.

Each Wednesday @12pm there will be a 1.5hr LIVE workshop that will help you delve deeper into what you really want from the year ahead and overcome any self doubt that may be holding you back. Every workshop includes insight into the brain and topic, breathing techniques, guided meditation and Emotional Freedom Technique (Tapping).

4th January - Self Love & Set Intentions

11th January - Overcome Negative Beliefs

18th January - Manifest the Life you Want 

25th January - Step into your Power

"The Happy Head’s retreat came at the best time possible for me. The retreat provided the perfect pause for reflection.I would definitely recommend."

Doula

After the workshops you’ll receive a support email that has all the key insights from what you learnt, a meditation recording for you to use, tapping videos to follow and a weekly (easily doable) practice to help you integrate the tools and techniques into your day. Each one will be recorded so if you miss one you can always catch up.

"That was AMAZING Kim thank you. I cried the whole way through it!"

Rachel

It’s been designed to completely reset your mind, body & soul. Spaces are limited, to book on click the link below or you can get in touch kim@happyheads.me.

The whole retreat is £110, spaces are limited don’t miss out!I can't wait to see you all.

Big Love xx

“I have just finished the Happy Heads Retreat and really cannot recommend it highly enough. As someone with a chronic neurological condition I have suffered with worry, self-doubt and anxiety most of my adult life. Kim delivers the sessions in a very calm and gentle manner and she has such a reassuring way about her which really helped me to believe I could achieve what I wanted to. The retreat left me feeling truly empowered. If you want to make a change in your life then I urge you to try it for yourself."

Vikki

TAPPING FOR TIRED MUMS

Being a mum to a little one can feel really challenging because you are often sleep deprived and that's tough! When you’ve had a bad nights sleep there is a 66% amplification to your brains amygdala (fear response) which means:
- It’s easy to feel more anxious
- Harder to think clearly and focus
- Easier to think negatively
- Harder to self regulate your emotions
- Your nervous system may feel frazzled and more sensitive
- You may feel floaty and like you’re on another planet

Whilst I can’t give you the gift of sleep I do know how to calm your nervous system, which is all you need to do on days when you’ve had zero sleep and you'll be surprised at how much more awake you feel afterwards!
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Watch this video to see how it's done and reset your tired mind 👆🏼
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TAPPING FOR PARENTS

Finding time for self care as a parent can be tough when all your energy is being poured into your little ones. A child's brain is still very much developing, which is why they are unable to self regulate their emotions - they need us to help them. That's incredibly hard to do if you're feeling exhausted, stressed, anxious and low. The more you nurture your own mind, the easier it is to nurture theirs.

Watch this video to see how you can use tapping to calm your incredible parent brain.

If you would like more support nurturing your mind please get in touch kim@happyheads.me I would love to help xx

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HOW WE CAN HELP OUR KIDS POST PANDEMIC

I wrote an article for the brillaint Parentfolk about how we can support children and teens mental health and wellbeing post pandemic. You can check out the full article HERE on page 48-49.

TEACHING CHILDREN MEDITATION

There is nothing normal about the world we live in right now so it’s no surprise that lots of children and parents are feeling anxious, stressed and overwhelmed. Happy Heads teaches people how to stop, pause and breathe - empowering you with simple tools and techniques that reduce anxiety, build confidence and help to release worries.

The 30 minute workshop below includes breathing techniques, guided meditation and Emotional Freedom Technique (also know as Tapping). EFT is a powerful way to help release tension held in both body and mind and overcome any negative thoughts that children or parents may be having right now…